Your Ideas Won’t Excite Them

But Forge Ahead

“I lack support and encouragement from those who surround me. I left employment to pursue my dream, but everyone is against me,” wrote a reader of Mkazi magazine. This challenge is shared by a good number of entrepreneurs, so much so that having your family and friends’ support while starting a business is more an exception than the norm.

Why are people closest to entrepreneurs often the least supportive? Well, they behave like crabs in a trap to protect themselves from you. To capture crabs at sea, you get a cage, put in some crab food and lower it in the ocean. Soon crabs start getting in to get the food. More and more crabs get in the cage even after the food is finished. Should one crab decide to get out of the trap and start climbing, the other crabs knock him off the wall to stop it from leaving. Should it persist, the other crabs cut its arms to stop him from climbing. And should it still try to climb out, they kill him.

Human do the same to the ones who try to escape the herd; to step out of traditional and societal roles. When people read about celebrities and other super achievers, they consider their success as something beyond reach. But if someone they know, who is just like them, breaks out of mediocrity, their excuses are eliminated. And most people cling to their excuses. When you overcome obstacles and succeed, your success disturbs their status quo, and their ego is ruffled.

If you are trying to build your own ladder instead of climbing the conventional corporate one, some people will try to break the arm of your ambition or to kill your dreams. They do this with innuendos, ridicule, sarcasm, doubt, mocking, laughing, and trying to make what you are trying to do seem ridiculous, impossible or scary. Some may come up with unsolicited advice. Some don’t even need to talk, but their eyes and body language speak volumes about what is in their mind.

Some will say they’re happy for you, that they support you and your dreams. But unconsciously they hope you will fail. Because your failure would prove them right, that the fears that keep them from giving entrepreneurship a try are valid.

I’m not out to dampen your excitement about your possibilities and potential. After all your dreams will keep you focused and your excitement will fuel your drive. Keep your feet on the ground though. When you encounter emotional turbulence, especially in the form of negativity from family and friends, know that it’s not about you, your ideas or your dreams. It’s about their own fear and lack of courage to step out of the trap and free themselves.

Your Friend in Biashara
-Angela

P.S What’s your experience? Do you get the support you need from your family and friends? Share your comments below?

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